Ultimate Leadership Newsletter

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September 21 - 26, 2008 - Just a few spots left in our Alumni Group - call soon to register!

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If you want to take a car down a road, you drive it straight ahead. It is designed to move that way, in the same direction the wheels are aligned.
You could try pushing it sideways, or rolling it end over end. That is possible, if you have a bulldozer that is big enough. The only problem is that the car will get smashed in the process and you won't get the performance from the car that it was intended to give you. It will be really slow and messy.
Unfortunately, many leaders lead that way; they set up their people's work, reporting relationships and culture in ways that are misaligned with their developmental design. This can lead to diminished performance, dysfunctional relationships, teams that don't work, and high turnover. People are designed to function in some specific ways, and these issues are not complicated. With a little knowledge of how people are constructed, some self-monitoring, and regular assessment of how things are working, a leader can avoid significant problems.
So, what are the issues a leader must consider? I will be taking a look at four of them in my next few articles. They begin early in life, and stay with us for the duration, no matter what we do. They are important in personal relationships, our health, and our work lives. In this article, we will look at the most basic and foundational need we have.
Our most basic need is to be connected to others by bonds of trust. We all need to feel we are "part of something," and not isolated. In leadership, some of this is functional and some of it is emotional. When people work, they must feel a connection to the leader, the team, and the "whole picture". Along with being functionally connected, the relationship with their leadership must be warm, trusting, and positive. They should feel needed, known, wanted, valued, and cared about. When those feelings are present, people give their all. They perform better and with greater satisfaction and loyalty. Connection and trust are basic to all that humans do, including the performance of great organizations.
Some leaders know this. They do things that build this functional connectedness and foster the emotional experience for their people as well. Functionally, they make sure that they have regular team meetings, and that everyone is part of the information loop, ensuring that no person is habitually cut off from key information. Individuals and teams suffer when part of the team is in the know and moves down a path - only to inform other key players later. This causes work-flow problems, alignment problems, and hurt feelings as cliques are suspected and paranoia grows. Good leaders keep people "in the know." They include them.
Wise leaders also make sure everyone on the team is aware of the work of each team member. That way, everyone feels valued and important, and all the members can see how their work affects another person's work. They realize that they are all interdependent. This eliminates situations in which one person believes that only their work matters, not seeing themselves as part of a whole. When team members learn to work together, with a common goal in mind, organizations run more smoothly and efficiently.
Leaders need to recognize that it will take some time and intention for people to feel connected to them. In my book Integrity, I wrote about a CEO's experience in laying someone off because of downsizing. The CEO was surprised to learn that his employee was not as upset over losing his job as he was that his boss had taken so little interest in him throughout his employment. Often, with leaders' time crunches, it is only the squeaky wheels that get the grease. Good leaders remember that there are key people who need a little one-on-one attention every now and then. It goes a long way, and there are both functional and emotional results.
Check in on your people. Drop by and ask how they are doing. Make regular "rounds" like a doctor does on a hospital floor. Take them to coffee at a time when there is no problem to talk about, just to see how they are. Ask if there is anything you can do to make things better. Send them a clip of an article that you have read that will help them. Send an e mail when you notice a good piece of work. Have a bonding day every now and then where you close the shop an hour early and take everyone out for a few hours, or do an office barbecue for lunch. They want to see you in an apron.
To make them feel valued, listen. Don't just tell them what to do and what your reality is, but listen to their views, thoughts, and experience. The more you do that, the more connected to you they will feel. You will capture their hearts, which is the basis of leadership. Good leadership needs to come from the heart, and is sustained by heart connections. If you listen and validate the experience and realities of those you lead, your leadership will be on more solid ground.
Driving the leadership car down the road aligned with how it is designed means that you must first consider people's basic need to feel connected. If you honor that need, you will go much farther. Your people will perform better, be more loyal, and have a much greater experience. Everyone wins, as the biblical value of "unity" is kept first and foremost in the leader's mind. God Bless!

Don't let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me.
( John 14:1 NLT )

A one-week
intensive workshop for leaders
with Dr. Henry Cloud
and Dr. John Townsend
Upcoming Ultimate Leadership workshop
in San Juan Capistrano, California -
September 21 - 26, 2008 -
Call soon to register!
Here's what people are saying about returning to Ultimate Leadership as alumni ...
The Ultimate Leadership alumni week once again proved to be well worth the financial investment and time commitment I made. My first Ultimate week set the stage for the work I accomplished during my second Ultimate week. I look forward to participating in the Ultimate process about every 24 to 36 months well into the future. My heart goes out to all those that have yet to realize that our growth process is a lifetime experience/process.
Many of the first-timers were asking me why I would return. My response was that it took me 45 years to get this messed up, and I expect it will take the next 45 to straighten me out. I believe that God calls me to take action to seek wholeness to the best of my ability. When I do, He takes me by the hand and leads me to a new level of appreciation for this life. Ultimate Leadership provides a safe environment where all I have to do is show up, serve up my stuff, and submit to the process
My two Ultimate experiences have made me a better husband, father, brother, son, friend and employer. I bring John and Henry's teachings into every role I have. Today, my life has very much improved. I am no longer the "people pleaser" and "doormat" I once was nor am I passive or aggressive; but I have come to better assert myself, to love myself and others better, and to work to mirror reality in a loving way to those within my sphere of influence.
May God richly bless the whole Ultimate team!
Dan Scherneck
President Safeway Building Services, Inc.
Colton, CA
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Dr. Henry Cloud's new book The One-Life Solution is due for release on August 12th.
In The One-Life Solution, bestselling author Dr. Henry Cloud examines the workplace. Through engaging real-world examples, Dr. Cloud shows us how to construct and enforce better boundaries against the technological devices, bullying bosses, and distracting coworkers who invade our time and space.

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